4 July.

A NEW SAVIOUR, 1583

travel,court_patronage,household_family,money_legal,letters_books,angelic_spiritual,visitors_network

Thursday, hora II ante meridiem. Note. When 1 came home yesterday from the Court, and from London, and from the Lord Laski, 1 found that E.K. was purposed to ride forth of town, and intended to be away (as he expressly told me) five days: certain companions and his acquaintance having so appointed with him,. some tarrying for him in Mortlake and some at Brainford (as was perceived this day afterward, and as he confessed unto me). Whereupon 1 thought good to signifY so much unto the Lord Laski, who meant to come and refresh himself at my house as he was wont before, either this day or within two or three days after: who also delighted in E.K. his company, &c. Hereupon about the time ofE.K. his rising 1 wrote these lines, intending to send them presently to the Lord Laski, that word might be returned of his intent before E.K. should ride, 1 meaning and hoping to persuade E.K. to tarry so long, and upon such respect: Most Noble Prince, on returning home I found our friend Edward, who certainly appeared happy: but girding himself (as he says) for a journey of five days. And this morning he is preparing for departure, and he assures me that he will return within five days: although only our true and omnipotent God knows what the actual truth may be. This letter being now written, and not yet folded up, my friend E.K. was ready and came out of his chamber into my study; and 1 told him that 1 was even now sending word to the Prince Laski of his riding out, and return after five days, and so showed him the letter: who when he came to the phrase 'What the actual truth may be', he was somewhat offended, saying: 'What secret meaning hath this, upon some of your two former conference?' 'Truly,' said I, 'even such as the circumstance of the letter doth import, that is; whereas you said that you intended to return within five days, or at the five days' end, it is uncertain whether you will, or shall, return later or sooner: and therefore "what the actual truth may be" of your return, or intent to return, only God doth know.' He would by no means admit that my sincere exposition, but seemed suspicious of some other undue constructions of those former words. Thereupon I took the letter and tore it in three pieces, and sent none: but in my mind referred all to God his disposition, assuring myself of God his most constant proceeding in his own affairs. Shortly after said E.K. to me: 'Certainly here is a spiritual creature in my right shoulder, who sensibly saith to me "Come away".' 'So,' said I, 'did one say to "Saul, when they would have had him away to have drowned him, whom I stayed in this study by force, and so hindered the Devil of his purpose then: as appeareth by that unhappy man yet alive.' 'Nay,' said E.K., 'they have told me that ifI tarry here I shall be hanged, and ifI go with this Prince he will cut off my head, and that you mean not to keep promise with me: and therefore if I might have a thousand pound to tarry, yea a kingdom, I cannot. Therefore I release you of your promise of 50 pounds yearly stipend to me, and you need not doubt but God will defend you and prosper you, and can of the very stones raise up children to Abraham. And again, I cannot abide my wife, I love her not, nay I abhor her; and here in the house I am misliked, because I favour her no better.' To these, such his words spoken in great pangs and disquietness of mind, I replied and said that these his doings and sayings were not of God, and by my whole proceeding he might perceive what confidence I reposed in his dealing with the spiritual, our friends, seeing even to the uttermost penny (and more than my ability served unto conveniently) I laid out still about the performing of such things, as were by me to be done, &c. Well, on the sudden, down he went: upon his mare, and away toward Brainford. After whose going, my wife came up into my study, and I said: 'Jane, this man is marvellously out of quiet against his wife, for her friends their bitter reports against him behind his back, and her silence thereat, &c. He is gone,' said I, 'but I beseech the Almighty God to guide him and !J. 98 !J.